"Are You Sure You Know What You're Doing, God?"

potter

These words have been uttered, or at least thought, by me more than once.  There have been tremendous periods of upheaval in my life - in the lives of those who make up my family - more than once.

I look at situations and think, "Surely, this is not what is supposed to happen."

I have the firm conviction that events in our lives are not random.  I struggled with that for months after the death of my daughter.  I not only wondered if the events were random ... I wondered if there was a God at all.

After many difficult moments, I came to realize that yes, there is a God - and yes, He is in control.

Yet, I struggled with that, too.  If God was in control, didn't that mean He had the ability to cause thing or prevent them from happening?

Where I have landed is the place where I believe that yes, God is in control - but that He doesn't cause things to happen in our lives.  A fractured world has taken care of that.  But events are allowed to touch us.

It during the times of struggle when I question those times.

"God?" 

"Are you sure this is to be allowed in my life?"

"Really sure?"

"Isn't this some kind of mistake?"

Lately, I've been questioning God as to the onslaught of my husband's health issues.  They are causing him personal difficulties.  They are causing our family itself to have problems and conflicts.

Memory loss in a loved one is never easy.

"God?"

"Are You sure?"

I now have this verse underlined in my Bible.  

"You turn things around!  Shall the potter be considered equal with the clay, that what is made would say to its maker, "He did not make me": Or what is formed say to him who formed it, "He has no understanding"? Isaiah  29:16

Once again, I see others, years and years ago, have questioned God's existence.  They have questioned His actions.  They, too, have asked God, "Are you sure You know what you are doing?"

This verse helps me remember that God is the one orchestrating my life - our family's lives.  It helps me to view God as I should.  My creator.  The one who loves me.  The one who knows exactly what He is doing.

I don't need to question.

I can rest secure that He does know, He does understand, and in His truly infinite wisdom, knows exactly what He is doing - and I can trust that.

You see, my mom was a potter.  From childhood, I watched her throw pots on her wheel and make amazing creations.  She decided if that particular lump of clay was suited to be a pot, or a vase, or a bowl - even a plate.  Her hands guided every movement that clay made.

If that clay had been able to talk, I am sure it would have had many questions as to why it had been dug up from the coolness of the earth.  Why it had been wedged (the lump of clay slid through a sharp wire to cut it in half and then slammed down on a plaster bat to remove any air pockets that might cause the creation to explode in the kiln) over and over. Then, as it spun around, being slathered with water, feeling pinched and squeezed - guided with strong firm hands.

What if all its life it wanted to be a grand vase sitting on the mantle of a wealthy owner - showcased in all its brilliance?

What if it became nothing more than a simple garden flower pot no one would ever see?

What if, the potter, seeing that things were not developing as it should, scraped the clay off the wheel, re-wedged it, and began to make the pot anew, knowing something better could be make from the clay?

Life makes more sense to me when I view it that way.  I feel these are re-wedging days for our family.

Something better is coming.

And those strong hands of the Potter will guide us to them.

Father God, Thank you for word pictures.  Thank you that your truths and your wisdom are presented to us in ways we can understand.  Thank you for how personally we can apply them.  And Lord, for all those times I've questioned?  Thank you for showing me the answers in ways I can understand.  Amen and amen.

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